When to Advise and When to Listen

There is no question that Molly is ready and rearing to go, blazing into adulthood and her future...despite that, there are times when the weight of the responsibility of growing up and being responsible for herself really can really make her second guess her plans and ability to see them through...I'm trying not to influence her decision, but give her whatever feedback she's looking for to validate what she's feeling.

Fortunately, she has options available to her. She spoke of feeling overwhelmed today thinking about heading to college...to be honest, I think I'd have more concern if she DIDN'T express concerns for being able to handle it successfully. She spoke about discussions in class about the percentage of freshmen who don't make it. Couple that with the fact she's taken some credit hours now and has a better expectation of what is to come, and I'm very hopeful she'll be wise enough to make the right kind of decisions.

At dinner tonight we talked to her about the simple basics of college that can make or break you, and it's all determined by what she choses to do. We explained that just going to class is a biggie, and a major factor in whether kids succeed or fail. And going to class is entirely up to her and the choices she makes. We let her know she can stay here at home for a semester or more, or she can start classes somewhere other than KU. It has to be about what works for her. If she gets frustrated or overwhelmed too quickly in the experience, she may not want to see it through. She's smart enough to know without a college education behind her she's going to have a tough future. We have to be smart enough to help make that happen for her.

When we went to KU Med yesterday to start with Terry's appointments, I saw nurses walking around the hospital and kept thinking to myself in just a couple of years she can be one of them...it was such a powerful realization that I was surprised at how I felt. Becoming a nurse is something Molly and I have talked about for a while. She is literally but months away from making that goal and dream a reality. I wish I could slow down the clock to make it all last a little longer, but know I can't. All I can do now is hope all we've done is what should have been done...too late now if it's not.